What the FUCK?!

• Category: Journal
• Date: 12.2.09

6 Day 6 Pack – Testimonial

• Category: Testimonials
• Date: 11.27.09

Look at this amazing testimonial! A regular girl + our program for 6 days = INSANE RESULTS!

My story is that I have been on a long road of learning how to lose weight and be healthy all on my own for years now. I was raised in a family that loved “FRIED EVERYTHING” and doesn’t have a real drive to workout. That’s not to say that we aren’t all athletes and have played sports all our lives. But an actual knowledge of healthy living hasn’t existed. I got extremely overweight in college, weighing at least 184lbs. So I have tried to lose weight with traditional cardio to no avail. So I would starve myself, then binge, then do it all over again. Maybe losing some weight, only to gain it back.

So about a year and a half ago, I really started doing some research on my own to learn what is really healthy. Because I knew I couldn’t just keep “dieting” my whole life. It had to eventually come to an end. That’s when I actually gained the knowledge of eating natural, unprocessed foods was the best way of living a healthy lifestyle. I also started doing resistance training, which I had been afraid of due to my fear of getting “too bulky”. This has been quite a learning process for me. A lot of trial and error, a lot of trying to convince my family that what I am doing “IS” healthy and trying to help them. But all the while, I have wanted desperately to get in that absolute perfect “FIGURE” that I have wanted for so long. Over the summer I ate probably 85-95% plant based food. My goal was to get to 17% body fat. I don’t know if I did or not, but I know I weighed 128lbs on Aug. 1st. And I am almost sure I may have even lost a little over the next 10 days because I was being extremly careful about eating for a wedding I was in on Aug. 8th. I felt good about the way I looked, but for some reason I still wasn’t satisfied. But I had deprived myself for so long I just wanted to EAT! And all the while, I just told myself that I could, because I knew I could lose it again.

Crossfit Kingston Regulations

• Category: Journal
• Date: 11.26.09

This comes from my buddy Burns over at Crossfit Kingston. Fucken guy is hilarious. Check this shit out!

With many new faces in the gym I feel I should remind all members of the policies and procedures at CrossFit Kingston. These regulations are slightly different than the policies at many other local facilities so please take the time to re-familiarize yourself with them.

WOD REGULATIONS

We recommend lifting as heavy a weight as you can do safely and to do it as quickly as possible

Do not share equipment with others as it will effect your time and slow you down. Do not allow others to use your equipment

when doing multiple sets.

PLEASE DROP WEIGHTS. If you do not drop weights you may be asked to leave.

Please report equipment failures to the staff on duty. Nothing will be done about this but feel free to ask.

Re-rack all weights/plates to their designated storage areas. Or stack all the plates in one area completely ignoring the other area.

Weightlifting chalk must be used.

Members should clean the equipment after use as it is common knowledge that the owner will not do so at any point during his

day

DRESS CODE

Minimal dress is encouraged. This means if you are female please wear the shortest shorts possible and anything that resembles a

bra

Males are encouraged to take their shirts off because we are jacked and the CrossFit women undoubtably want to watch us workout shirtless. Well

done CrossFit men. We are amazing.

Members are encouraged not to wear shitty running shoes because they suck for everything including running. Do not HEEL STRIKE

and you will not need your nike shox or other similar pieces of shit.

MEMBER CONDUCT

Water in closed, recyclable containers are allowed. If you bring a plastic throw away water bottle everyone in your class will have

to complete 20 burpees while you watch. This will cause people to hate you and say mean things about you behind your back.

Alcohol is permitted and encouraged on Friday afternoons

Loud and/or abusive language is encouraged and will help you get stronger and more fit.

Harassment or disregard of the directions provided will result in laughter by many members and stress for the owner. Please

fucking listen to me

LOCKER ROOM POLICY

We don’t have a locker room

Any items left in the shower will be left in the shower until you retrieve them. When using the shower be sure to secure the duct

tape so that the shower curtain stays up.

CLIENT POLICY

If showing signs of fatigue and light headedness, it means you have either hit a PR on a big lift or you are pushing hard through a

WOD. Thank you for your effort. If you stop mid-WOD to have a drink it will be suggested that you stop being a pussy and wait

until the WOD is over to waste time drinking.

If you fail to show up for a class just blame ZenPlanner or the fact that you are retarded and can’t use a computer properly.

If in the case of a client who does not feel satisfied with the service provided, fuck off you are wrong.

Thank you for taking the time to read the policies and procedures of CrossFit Kingston. It is the aforementioned regulations that make CFK such a wonderful place to train.

What a great list of rules and regs. Fucken genius! haha. If you’re ever in the area, check him out: Crossfit Kingston